If you put your kids in daycare, then you should be okay with your kids putting you in a nursing home when you are old. Fair is fair.
I don’t like the idea of putting people in institutions because they are not profitable beings, but that is the way it is in “modern” countries.
You shouldn’t have to be an expert in every field. Ideally, you should be able to trust the experts you pay money to add one less worry in your mind. Unfortunately, when it comes to pregnancy, that doesn’t seem to be fully the case in my small Christ loving town of Corpus Christi, Texas. You see, they don’t do any genetic screening at 10 weeks like every normal place in the first world. So make sure you DEMAND your noninvasive prenatal screening (NIPT)!
They sure like to assume you are trash by testing you for all sorts of drug use. They took so much blood out on my 10 week test that I assumed they were doing a genetic screening. But noooo. How does this information help me? I already know I don’t do drugs!
They did do a genetic test like at my 16th week, and revealed the results on my 17th week and told me I had higher odds for a down syndrome child. Wtf, why are they telling me this now when I am far into the pregnancy? Then my husband and I did a genetic test on a website called xcode, they claimed they included down syndrome in their tests, so we bought it. Just to be sure, I emailed the company and they said they don’t actually include it with the 23andme data I uploaded because it doesn’t have all the data. So now I just have to wait for the actual doctor’s results…. like 14 days I believe.
Also had a miscarriage scare. Bleeding way more than a first day’s period non stop. Lost all my pregnancy symptoms. Called the nurse at my doctor’s office and she told me the safe answer, “go to the ER”… where it costs $5000 (I’ve been there years ago) and run the risk of getting COVID19! And I was like no no no. Why would I go there? What’s the risk if I don’t go? Why can’t I just get an ultra sound at another doctor’s office? I didn’t feel like I was near death, and if it is a miscarriage, there is nothing they could do. Plus, I had an ultrasound done a few days earlier at the OBGYN’s office. If there was a life threatening problem, couldn’t they have found it then? After making these logical points, they told me they had no ultrasound appointments available today and the only place available was the ER.
So I took the initiative to call the local MFM and asked if they had any openings that day, they said yes! But I would need a referral from my OBGYN. So I called the OBGYN nurse back and told her the good news. And she said she can’t do the referral because MFM is only for extreme cases. I told her that the ER is for extreme near death cases too, but the MFM is only like $200 a visit vs. $5000. After pushing and pushing, she booked an appointment for me at the local radiology place which was only $63!!!! They would fax the ultrasound to my doctor and they would tell me what is going on.
Turns out, the baby was still there and I had some weird condition called subchorionic hemorrhage! What were the odds of that?! I read it is typical in women who had IVF. I didn’t have that! I think it has to do with being in your 30’s and having kids right after the other… I think… just a hypothesis someone might test because from the stories I read, there were other women who had it who were also in their 30’s and had other kids. I believe I healed from it.
So much drama in this pregnancy so far.
So in conclusion, be an expert online researcher and critical thinker. Don’t trust the medical experts to do it fully for you!
My other conclusion is aim to have children between the ages of 20-24 so the odds of a drama-free pregnancy is much much much better! They don’t tell you this in liberal-agenda schools!
I find it funny that the anti-mask movement in Texas uses the body autonomy argument. They don’t realize that not wearing a mask could potentially kill people around them, and those people could kill people around them. These are the same people who believe in body autonomy except for a woman’s right to have an abortion. All this fuss for the unborn, yet they are okay to grow a virus chain that has killed millions of people?
To this day, I have nightmares about living in a cramped studio apartment. It didn’t help that the landlord was creepy af, sitting in his lobby office, observing everyone passing by, and then calling me one time to ask if I have a boyfriend living with me, he claimed to have seen via surveillance footage, and that he would have to raise my rent (there was no one living with me, and if I had a “boyfriend”, he was a jerk who would visit like once a week at most). It was so small, that even the poor people I knew who came to visit me always remarked right away how small it was. At the time, all I really cared about was saving money (I was in severe student loan debts), location (it was close to ALL amenities), and I needed just enough room for a bed and to use a computer and a little bit of cooking. Well, I guess I didn’t know much about psychology because it was so cramped and the vibes of poverty, just so much sadness around. Feeling a little embarrassed every time someone came over. It was bad. It’s been like almost eight years but I still have nightmares about that place!
Now that I live in a big house, I only find it annoying that I have to walk down the stairs from my bedroom when I need a glass of water. In a studio apartment, you just need to roll over on your bed and your sink is right beside you. I’m always thirsty! First world problems! But I don’t think I would ever have a nightmare about that.
I feel like I have been told in every life situation to be tough with the EXCEPTION of motherhood.
How is it that suddenly I am hearing on every mom website and person to “take a break”, “self-care” and all that? This is such a foreign concept suddenly!
It starts in school where you spend all day there, eat a cold packed meal (because you are too stupid to be trusted with using a mini oven), and spend hours doing homework, and be super stressed and scared about exams because, as the message goes, this is your only chance at life to shine, if you mess up, your future is bleak, you will be poor and homeless! And if you are like most people, you should do this while being poor.
And if you are an older kid, at 16, you should be tough enough to do a part-time job that gives you a measly 15 minute break after 5 hours or so. If you are in retail, you have to stand up the whole time with your legs hurting. If you are telemarketing, you get headaches from all the verbal harassment. And you are probably commuting to this job two hours total in a bus.
And then you probably get a sketchy “real job” that earns you money all right but you know is a big waste of time and is not contributing to society (think insurance, agents, etc). And you are expected to be there 8 hours a day everyday with only 10 days of vacation a year and some statutory holidays!
But suddenly, when you are a mom, you hear the message everywhere: “TAKE A BREAK”, “SELF CARE!” This is actually the time when you are supposed to exert your energy the most. But society tells you that this energy should be dedicated to school and work, not your children!
So how do we summarize this message? The customer is always right, the customer is king, but when you have a kid who is vulnerable to you, it is okay to put yourself first?
Well I have exerted a lot of energy but I will not stop now!